Fake Border Patrol Truck In San Diego?

San Diego residents have recently reported sightings of a peculiar truck that closely resembles a Border Patrol vehicle. However, a closer look reveals that it is labeled “Porder Batrol.” Intrigued? 

The Legend of Slowjamastan

Slowjamastan is a unique and whimsical nation that has recently emerged on the global stage. While it may be nestled within the borders of the United States, Slowjamastan prides itself on its distinct identity and culture. As with any nation, Slowjamastan has its own set of rules and regulations, and, of course, borders that need protecting. This is where the Porder Batrol comes into play.

Meet Chief Mark Corona

At the helm of Slowjamastan’s border security is the infamous Chief Mark Corona. Chief Corona is the first line of defense for this fledgling nation, tasked with ensuring that its borders remain secure and its laws are upheld. The Sultan of Slowjamastan himself has authorized Chief Corona to patrol and safeguard the nation’s boundaries, necessitating a suitable vehicle for the job.

The Porder Batrol Truck

Is the Porder Batrol truck real? Absolutely! It’s a genuine patrol truck specifically designated for Slowjamastan. The truck’s design closely mimics that of a traditional Border Patrol vehicle, with one crucial difference—the name. Due to trademark restrictions on the name “Border Patrol” in the United States, Slowjamastan opted to cleverly rearrange the letters, creating the “Porder Batrol.” This playful twist ensures that the truck is still recognizable as a patrol vehicle while avoiding any legal complications.

Patrolling the Streets of San Diego

Why is this Porder Batrol truck cruising the streets of San Diego? Since Slowjamastan is located within the United States, it made perfect sense for Chief Corona to adopt the familiar colors and style of a Border Patrol vehicle. This decision aids in identification and ensures that residents and visitors alike recognize the authority of the Porder Batrol.

Upholding the Law in Slowjamastan

Like any country, Slowjamastan has its own set of laws. One notable regulation is the prohibition of Crocs—yes, the holey shoes, not the reptiles. Chief Mark Corona takes his role very seriously and does an exceptional job of enforcing these laws while patrolling in his trusty Porder Batrol truck.


The sighting of the Porder Batrol truck in San Diego has certainly piqued the curiosity of many. This unique vehicle, led by the dedicated Chief Mark Corona, is a testament to Slowjamastan’s commitment to its identity and security. So, the next time you see the Porder Batrol truck cruising the streets, give a friendly wave to Chief Corona, and remember the whimsical nation of Slowjamastan.

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